SELF CARE IS NOT SELFISH

blog May 13, 2016
SELF CARE IS NOT SELFISH

Attending a conference a few years back, I was struck by this quote from keynote speaker, David Welke, “The important things in life often get bullied and regulated by the urgent things.” I bet if you stopped to think about it, you'd agree this happens far more often than you would like. How many times have you postponed, cancelled or just skipped something you've really wanted, needed or looked forward to doing simply because someone or something required your immediate attention? After all, it would be considered selfish to put our own needs ahead of of family, friends or work, right? Yep, we've all done it, present company included. And quite willingly I might add. But is continually postponing our own needs and doing only for others really the best course of action in the long run? I think not.

Now just to be clear, I am not in any way suggesting we shouldn't be extending a helping hand to those in need, it's the over-extending many of us are not even aware we are doing that is contributing to many of today's health issues. Neglecting your own health – not getting enough sleep, skipping meals, eating out, exercising less, working longer hours, spending less time with family, giving up activities that bring you joy, etc., for any length of time increases stress and puts us at risk for any number of conditions.

Regardless of what reasons you give yourself, or how you justify putting yourself last, developing a condition(s) like high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, stroke, some cancers, weight gain, compromised immune function, headaches, back/neck pain, poor sleep is never is never worth it. Think about it, if you're own health is suffering and it's difficult to manage your own affairs day to day, how can you possibly be of help to anyone else? The airlines have it nailed down – and I've used this analogy before – you've got to put your own oxygen mask on first before helping anyone else.

As a mom, when I first heard this instruction on a plane I thought to myself, “That's just crazy! Who wouldn't put their kid's mask on first?” I swear the flight attendant was a mind reader because to this day she is the only one I've heard address that point, saying to everyone on the flight, “....After all, you're no good to your kids or anyone else around you if you're unconscious.” Wow, talk about a shift in perspective.

Today, I encourage people to adopt that same principle by taking the oxygen mask mentality out of the plane and applying it to their everyday lives, specifically in how it relates to their own health and well being. How much better would parents be equipped to handle their toddler's temper tantrums if they made sure to schedule some time, even just 10 minutes each day, to relax and unwind? And how much more interaction and conversation would there be at breakfast each day if lunches were packed and ready to go the night before? And think of how much more energy and focus you have at work after taking the time to eat a proper lunch rather than foregoing food and working straight through? Not to mention you'd be a lot less cranky heading home to your family at the end of the day.

Looking at the bigger picture, think of how eating right, exercising, managing stress, etc., (or not) will play out as you age. Achieving and maintaining good health as we get older not only allows us to enjoy our golden years, it allows our family to enjoy those years by doing life with us, rather than spending that precious time tending to our ailments. So you see, making your health a priority, or making sure to put on your own oxygen mask first, is anything but selfish.

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